Patience is a Flower

In college, a friend of mine had a little saying taped to her wall:

Patience is a flower that does not grow in my garden.

If you knew my friend, you knew this saying to be true.

Personally, I've always thought of myself as a relatively patient person. I tend toward the type A personality, but I'm pretty calm in my nature. Not the go out, party all night, dance on the tables type of girl (although there have been times I've secretly wanted to be that girl). But I digress...

I bring up the topic of patience, because since having kids, my patience is constantly tried in new and interesting ways. And there are times when my lack of patience really gets the better of me. I find it happens most recently with my 2-year old. Abby's always been a pretty easy kid. She eats well, sleeps at night, takes her nap, has a good attitude, is smart, does what I say for the most part. Lately, however, she pushes the limits. In my head, I understand she's 2 and this is what kids do - they push their limits with the ones who love them the most because we're the safest ones with whom to act this way. But because she's always been such an easy kid, I find her being difficult extremely trying in the patience arena. I can only answer "Why" and "Why not" so many times a day. I can only repeat her phrases back to her so often. I can only give her exactly what she wants 85% of the time.

The parents in Abby's class seem to be having similar difficulties with their kids, which, quite honestly, makes me feel a lot better. I take comfort in the fact other peoples' kids give them a hard time too. It makes me feel a little less alone in the battle. During Abby's classes, we do a separation time, so the kids get to play by themselves and the parents get to have some discussion time. Yesterday's discussion centered around how the kids are trying us right now; the kids in this class are 2 and 3. And you know what? Every one of those parents admitted their kids drive them crazy at times. And they all had problems with losing their patience.

So, what gives? Obviously we all want to be the best parents we can be. But when the kids aren't being the best they can be, how do we handle it? Do we use time outs? Discipline? Remove ourselves from the situation? Yell? Have an extra glass of wine that night?

Come on readers, what do you do, when the patience flower is wilting in your garden?