Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Oh the Things You Can Do

So, yesterday I was in the bathroom. And as I sat there (yes, women actually do use toilets, even if their male counterparts refuse to acknowledge it), I started doing things. No, not things attached to my elimination system. But other kinds of things. Do you have any idea what a woman can do while she's on toilet? I've compiled a small list, just to give you a idea of the things I can do:

1. Sort laundry.

2. Restock the toilet paper.

3. Yell at the kids.

4. Yell at the dogs.

5. Yell at the cats.

6. If there happens to be a pen and paper nearby, I can make one of my many, many lists.

7. Teach the kids how to knock on a door BEFORE entering.

8. Brush my hair.

9. Empty the wastebasket.

10. Try really hard to take a nap. But we don't have one of those cushy toilet seats, so that's a tough one. And if it actually does happen, chances are my legs will fall asleep and then I'll give myself a concussion when I crash into the sink when I try to stand up.

Multi-tasking from the bathroom. Give it a try. See what you can do!


  1. lol...glad I am not the only one who multi tasks on the toilet....

  2. Hah! I usually do my grocery list while sitting on the toilet :)

  3. I've done all of these except yell at the dog. We don't have a dog. And you make this long list (while on the can?) without mentioning checking email or making a call.

    "What? What's that? I'm doing dishes, Ma!"

  4. Awesome! I think I've done 80% of this stuff, plus taught my toddler how to lock, unlock and shut the door... And then have to unlock the door so he doesn't totally freak out and we can start the process all over again... :)

  5. Snort.

    I feel a little Seussical, but I feel like you could write similar pieces from a kitchen chair, living room couch, bed, and bathtub. Fun! Erin

  6. Ha! How about rearrange the cabinet right in front?
    Good stuff!

  7. hehe, if you bring your phone in with you, you can play Words with Friends in there, too. ;D

  8. I am most impressed that you can sort laundry whilst sitting on the john.

    I feel like such an underachiever now.

  9. Um, yup. So, so true! Hilarious. I think I've done most of this.:)


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